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Surf’s Up*

There was strong evidence of the far-reaching power of nepotism witnessed by just a few Club Officials on Wednesday night As members assembled in the Studio above Reception at the Sutton SoccerDome, a delegation approached El Presidente with the news that it was his turn to administer deep cleaning for the night's soiled bibs Shocked and momentarily silenced our leader grimaced and muttered indecipherable words to himself whilst continuing to ignore the news Later we found out just why!

An odd number of 33 declared runners (shurely shome mishtake?) took to designated Yellow line to warm up under the expert guidance of Andy Man(anger) The management decision to have 3 sets of matches with 3 teams of 5 and 3 further teams of 6 was acknowledged as the best solution for expediency Selection was swift and on the face of it pretty fair Those selected were;

Yellow (5) - Chris 4G, Eamon, Darron, Deggs and Michelle

Blue (5) - Roger, Gonzalo, Andy Man(anger), Gaz and Joe the Ghost

Red (5) - Dec Smyth (on debut), Steve Carine, CP10 (aka Crispy), Lefty Bridge and Kenny Nolan

Purple (6) - Harry the Hatchet, Enoch, Little John, Eileen, Lee Thomo and Deano

Sky (6) - Keith, Wickie, Les, Phil the Power, Grav and Barry

White (6) - Dave Martland, Rich Evans, Les Hewitt, Haggis, Martin Mc and Paul Henesy

In the first of the night's games Yellow faced Blue in a genuine 5 a side match Gonzalo produced a touch of magic to fire the first shot However his left foot effort went wide and then wider again much to relief of his opponents There was an untidy passage of play with 2 incidents of over elaboration - a foul firstly for 14 touches before the error was repeated but with just 5 touches on the second occasion Moments later we had the first goal when Blue produced a terrific move with Gaz, Andy, Joe and Gonzalo all involved before Gonzalo cut across the defenders to pick his spot 1-0 with just 5 minutes gone The untidy play returned with one individual pinged for heading the ball not once but twice An opponent was warned next for two late lunges in succession El Presidente threatening to show his Blue Card for the second week Blue were on top, Yellow struggling to find the accuracy to find a leveller Gaz doubled the Blue lead with a fine side foot effort 2-0 Yellow eventually did mount an effort on target with Chris 4G dealt with by the Blue keeper Andy almost sealed the win with a midfield swoop and snapshot But it was the unpredictable Joe the Ghost, who had a quiet opening game, who squeezed home the third and final goal 3-0 to Blue

Next door Sky and Red could not find a goal or a winner after their encounter Referee Jeff Betty explaining that in a close game neither side truly deserved to lose

In Round Two Yellow and Purple met to test the mettle of the Yellow 5 Purple with their numeric advantage unsurprisingly dominated posession throughout but lacked the guile to find the decisive goal There was an amazing save by Eamon in the Yellow goal, who batted away a fierce drive with his forearm Deano on the unfortunate end of the incident Deggs fired a rare cross shot wide in a Yellow breakaway There was a period where players from both sides were left prone on the 'bird poo' strewn surface Luckily all recovered without treatment or soiled kit Time elapsed with both teams unable to hit the net 0-0

In the parallel world that was Pitch B Sky hit four goals to demolish the White challenge Goals by Grav x2, Paul and Rich secured the win whilst Les Meldrew claimed both goals in consolation for Los Blancos, back in his favoured Inzaghi position playing on the shoulder of the keeper at all times

The night's final round of action Blue and Sky served up a gem of a game that left El Pres' mightily impressed Blue started on top with an excellent spell of passing and movement All players involved Gonzalo passing into the corner only to be thwarted by a diving save from Keith

Despite being a player light Blue were good value and deservedly took the lead when Gonzalo found his range to fire home Grav was injured almost immediately with a hamstring strain ending his evening as an outfield player Forced between the 'sticks' Grav, as we all know is an accomplished keeper and set about demonstrating just how competent he is with a series of blocks, saves and scrambles to preserve his team's chances The game took a distinct change of direction when Barry reacted first to steer home an equaliser

Blue then found the combination of Grav and the woodwork too much Gonzalo rattled both posts, Andy found Grav twice rather than the net from short range Sky rode their luck and with Blue growing ever-more frustrated, Barry played a One Two with Les to shoot home 2-1 Sky a smash and grab winner when Blue had the upper hand throughout

The Sky rearguard resembled the Alamo bruised and battered but somehow holding out to claim the victory

Yellow ran riot in Jeff Betty's last match A brace each for Deggs and Eamon plus a goal by Darron too strong for White Rich did claim a consolation for White but 5-1 was the night's most comprehensive victory

News broke in the Boot Room that Gonzalo had 'generously volunteered' to look after the bibs lifting the pressure off his Father for another day Huyton's finest muttered (nothing new there) about Warrington and privilege but the unflappable Dictator shrugged off the slight Whether or not Gonzalo uses Surf or a gentler detergent we might never know

Surf's Up* - The Beach Boys

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