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(Debi) Debris*

Just another Storm system By now the fourth of the Autumn, one could be forgiven for dismissing the claim that a temporary discomfort suffered by a Home Counties umbrella user is somehow part of a much bigger cunning plan We Northerners are a hardy bunch, untroubled by gale force winds or rain deluges So it was really no surprise to witness 38 players lined up for their second warm up of the day Andy Man had started the process as we waited for the gates to open to the resplendent Arcoframe Arena at Ruskin Sports Village The second bite offered the chance for the selection Moneyball algorithm to be employed to ensure four teams of six, and two teams of seven were as evenly balanced as a Sunak reshuffle could only dream of

The teams making the final cut were;

Orange (7) - Snakehips, Andy Zac, Paul J, El Presidente, Enoch, Wickie and Harry the Hatchet

Black (7) - Gonzalo, Charlie, Eileen, Andy Man, Eamon, Kirsty and Mark NR

Sky - Grav, Citeh Geoff, Barry Wizz, Alan (impressive debutant), Thatto Dave and Michelle Monday

Pink - Sheila, Little John, Jill Tomo, Chris K, Roger and Phil the Power

Yellow - Les Meldrew, Amazon Prime, Les H, Donal, Chopper and Haggis

Purple - Paul F, Gary Riordan, Mika, Brian, Mike McSpeed and Tom Stretch

The cunning game plan was to set the Teams of seven against each other in a caged fight for the session under the weathered eye of the Late Colin Williams Whilst Jeff Betty and the Cockney Rebel handled the remains, four teams of six in a Round Robin mini tournament So far so good

Yellow faced Purple in the morning's first game officiated by Jeff Betty, limping much better now after recent his knee surgery Les Meldrew uncharacteristically gifted the first goal with a poor clearance straight to McSpeed who swept the ball home 1-0 to Purple and then swiftly 2-0 with McSpeed turning to fire home He was denied a hat trick when a goal bound effort was deflected off Chopper over the keeper's head Inexplicably Betty awarded the goal rather stopping play for a free kick to Yellow for over head height The goal stood though Mic'd Up Betty atoned for his error His apology to Yellow for the oversight took up most of his report

So let's move on to Game Two Pink triumphed in a tight tussle with Purple Goals by Chris K and Phil the Power (both goals threatening the arena fencing with their ferocity)

McSpeed grabbed a consolation but Pink prevailed 2-1

In Game Three there was an epic draw with Sky and Purple locked at a goal apiece as time elapsed Purple equalised with a disputed penalty converted by Paul F

Ref Betty reflected the penalty award was a tad harsh, Barry had Wizzed into the area only due to his momentum (momentarily forgetting to apply air brakes to his moving mass) So distraught was Herr Betty that he neglected to record the Sky scorer He did comment however that he was happy that this Blog gave him the opportunity to issue a grovelling apology That's quite enough apologies for one Blog

In sharp contrast those games that fell under the control of the Cockney Rebel were relatively incident free Pink shaded Sky in the opening game on Pitch B Goals by Barry Wizz and a debut goal by newbie Alan Aldridge, who impressed all session, handed Pink a 2-0 victory that rarely looked in doubt Mr Rebel took the initiative to tweak the sides around before the next game Mika and Sheila were the subject of a multi £million exchange Chelski fan Mr Rebel splashing the cash around with reckless abandon? Perish the thought

Yellow and Sky fought out a close match in the next round with Yellow coming out on top thanks to two goals by Amazon Prime Barry Wizz replied with a Yellow tap in but that was the extent of the Sky threat 2-1 and a hard earned victory for Yellow

In the last action Pink were unable to find the net and couldn't match the energy (one way of describing it) of Yellow with another Amazon brace sealing the 2-0 victory

The action from the morning's seven a side fixture was truly end to end stuff Orange with Wickie, El Presidente and Harry the Hatchet presented a stern defensive unit throughout Black with youth (and a benign referee in attendance) were swift about the park with Kirsty, Andy Man, Eileen and Mark NR passing and moving freely, presenting a constant threat Eamon grabbed a hat trick for the Black, whilst Charlie enhanced his growing reputation as a defensive rock Orange competed in the midfield areas with Paul J and Enoch industrious throughout but Snakehips was often swamped by his opponent's fluid movement and pace

Black dealt with growing confidence with the Cypriot hit man Andy Zac so Orange struggled to mount that cutting edge that much of their play deserved

The result at 5-3 to Black was a fair reflection on the morning's play A dubious penalty, awarded as El Presidente had gently brushed one of the invisible keeper's area markers, merely sealed the deal

Lots of earnest endeavour, loads of great passes, some suicidal passing too lest we forget but plenty of smiles and sportsmanship on show Well done all

Sutton SoccerDome is a formidable venue for casual Walking Footballers Our plethora of recent fashion sportswear purchases has meant that rather than casual our members are now sartorial elegance personified All of this makes great sense of course We've never had so much publicity 50 or 60 moving billboards spreading the image of SHWFC around the area at least twice a week plus there's a practical advantage too The rainjackets and sweat shirts are warm just perfect for before and after sessions

Midweek was where it all started for SHWFC, back in January 2015 on a Wednesday evening at the YMCA Beacon building Wednesday evenings moved to Sutton in 2018 and the SoccerDome has hosted sessions ever since We've had drama before Peter Adamson's collapse and cardiac arrest probably the stand out But this week we had a new drama that later rocked our Family but more of that later

The Indoor Insulators, the ten who repelled all Joe come latelys were handled by WFA Ref Jeff Betty, who later admitted he had his patience stretched at times The teams selected were the familiar foes (usual suspects);

Red - Enoch, Les H, Harry the Hatchet, Grav and Les Meldrew

Blue - Lee Thomo, Steve Honeyman, Chopper, Citeh Geoff and Kenny

Notes from Ref Betty describe a close fought contest, Red ahead when Grav skipped adjacent to area but stayed outside to poach the opener Kenny grabbed an equaliser as the game moved into the second period 1-1 Grav soon hit back to restore the Red advantage 2-1

Steve Honeyman claimed a further equaliser with a hotly disputed goal 2-2 Citeh Geoff showed a clean pair of heels to steel a loose ball and fire home Red claimed the move was contrary to the tackling from behind law but Ref Betty waved play on Blue 3-2 ahead before Lee struck to make it 4-2

in the last period Red mounted a sustained push to find a leveller, only to leave Lee unmarked to claim a fifth goal for Blue 5-2 and the game Late drama followed with Kenny shown a Blue Card on his return to the sessions after his extensive tour of Caribbean flesh pots Betty brandishing the Blue for Kenny's one man demolition of the Red forward line

Just a timing issue to the ring rusty holiday maker we are assured

The Shooting Party outdoors produced a sometimes frenzied hour of high quality Walking Football The teams were;

White - Chris 10P, Andy Man, Tom Stretch, Dave M, Roger, Little John, Jim Murph, Chris 4G and Deano

Blue - Barry Wizz, Eileen, Joe the Ghost, Gonzalo, Gaz, Deggs, Haggis, Jason and Mulla

The game ebbed and flowed through a chilly evening with both teams intent on out-pas sing and out manoeuvring their opponents Cockney Rebel kept a tight hold on 'not walking' with a constant encouragement to 'Slow down'

The weather and turnout meant that a 9 a side contest was the best way to ensure all were accommodated An early chance for Joe the Ghost flew inches wide Teams moved the ball around with great pace, but too often were too keen to charge after it White and Blue each probed before Gonzalo hit the opening goal after 5 minutes 1-0 to Blue Chris 10P smashed White back level before hitting another to stretch White 2-1 ahead Barry Wizzed an equaliser 2-2 with just 13 minutes gone

The first half produced plenty to admire but the numbers meant space was very limited The sides guilty of crowding around the ball like kids (something I never thought I'd say about Walking Footballers) Joe ghosted in to restore Blue's 3-2 lead

Gonzalo had the dubious honour of a Llandudno fine, imposed when he lashed a shot over the perimeter fence El Presidente departed to gather the wayward ball, and thankfully missed no goals or further incidents as he traipsed around Sutton to retrieve the ball

Half time brought a chance to regroup and recharge Blue were defending the Far End for the second stanza Deggs spurnrd a golden chance as Chris 10P spilled the ball saving from Gonzalo The shot wide summed up this frantic period of the game 3-2 Blue good value for their lead White made little impact on their opponents despite a growing level of control on proceedings A passing Fire Engine siren whipped up all players for a more urgent final period Blue committed too many to their attacking efforts and were picked off when Tom Stretched the Blue rearguard to level up 3-3 Chances at both ends and the prospect of a grandstand finish Scrappy play summed this passage of play Gonzalo was close but wide with a smart snap shot

With just 5 minutes left and unwelcome rain driving down Gonzalo collapsed clutching his thigh with no opponent nearby It was soon clear that he was seriously injured Play was halted to go to help the prone goal machine Eventually he was helped to his feet and off for the remaining time In his absence White took a strong hold on proceedings

Gonzalo as we now know tore part of his quad with possible damage to the hip flexor luckily he was able to use a VIP lane to bypass the normal queues Can't beat a bypass

Six minutes left White firmly on top, Deano forcing an excellent save from Gaz Could Blue hold out? The decisive moment came with less than 3 minutes left A penalty conceded when Ref Betty spotted that a Blue defender had strayed into his keeper's area The resulting penalty was delayed as the Huyton hitman kicked the ball away to incur the wrath of Ref Betty A two minute dismissal to the naughty step followed, yet again

Chris 10P made no mistake crashing the ball from the spot past Gaz's despairing dive 4-3 White taking the spoils with Blue effectively 2 men down at the end of a compelling game

Debris* - The Faces with Ronnie Lane vocals rather than Rod Stewart

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