Pain In My Heart*
- St Helens Walking Football
- Apr 12
- 7 min read
SHWFC members could be forgiven for thinking that a curse has struck the Club in the past month There’s been a spate of injuries that has lain low some of our stalwarts The Monday Morning Ruskin Sports Village gathering followed the pattern with Chris Kelsall forced off having heard a worrying pop in his thigh It is likely to be damage to his external part of his quad and will mean a spell of rest After Finger Gate and Eamon’s latest visit to the knee surgeon the news was a further blow
A goodly number attended the week’s opening session (better than biggly number - “no one knows more about Biggly than me” DJTrump who has never run whilst playing Walking Football (or indeed anywhere else)
Thirty Six combatants with Referees Betty & Presidente plus the late arrival of Lord Rainford (delayed indicting errant tenants from his estate) Duke of Edinburgh student Benny put in another sterling performance; helping to set out pitches, distribute bibs, chase the occasional wayward ball before filling the sizeable void left when Chris Kelsall was injured Considering his youthful playing experience he slotted in admirably and should congratulated for his contribution again
The team selection was as follows;
Sky - Grav, Snakehips, Cockney Rebel, Mika, McSpeed and Mike Tomo
Purple - Colin the late, Gonzalo, Haggis, Tom Derby, Barry Wizz and Harry the Hatchet
Red - Roy, Eileen, Brian, Ashy, Donal and Little John
Black - Mark NR, Gaz, Glen, Chopper, Robin and Triallist
Yellow - PaulF, Phil the Cat, Chris K, Wickie and Phil Moss
Pink - Les Meldrew, Andy Man, Kirsty, Enoch, Tony W and Les H
Once again we are reminded that the accuracy of the team personnel follows closely the accuracy of some of the passing and especially the shooting prowess of members
Play got promptly underway with Jeff over-seeing a very tight opening contest with Purple and Yellow meeting in the bruise Derby Purple shaded possession and pressure but couldn’t find a way past Phil the Cat Mullarkey Two world class saves denied the normally deadly Gonzalo A great indication of just how well the Cat performed
Chris Kelsall’s injury then led to introduction of Benny, who “did a fantastic job” slotting into the Yellow midfield The game ended in a stalemate Yellow thoroughly stretched but holding on for a well-deserved draw 0-0 the final outcome
Elsewhere Sky faced Red, with El Presidente determined to halt the ‘not walking’ edict The game was a cracker played in an excellent sporting manner Play switched from end to end Sky slightly more direct but Red matching their opponents with plenty of committed attacking play McSpeed eventually found a way to fire Sky in front Eileen and Ashy denying earlier efforts but Sky finally ahead 1-0 Undaunted Red found their rhythm and worked an excellent opening for Roy to level 1-1 McSpeed wouldn’t be subdued for long and combining with Grav and Cockney Rebel soon claimed his second goal for 2-1 Donal marauding from a deeper position stretched to poke an equaliser 2-2 Red most definitely matching Sky and possibly might have taken the lead when Roy fired just wide His strike narrowly missed the target but then carried on to nestle in the corner of the net on the adjoining pitch His claim for the only goal on that pitch was cruelly denied by Herr Betty, but if you don’t ask you’ll never get anything!
With the game moving to an inevitable draw Mike Thompson latched on to a loose ball and crashed an effort beyond the keeper to claim a Sky winner in the dying moments A really compelling game decided right at the end 3-2 Sky prevailing
Red faced Yellow in their final game Another close contest played at a sensible sedate pace but not short of incident There was plenty of great passing moves from both sides The winner late in the game was scored by Little John, who somehow squeezed a great shot from an acute angle The ball nestling in the roof of the net to his teammates delight 1-0 then to Red, a great end to the morning’s action
Black’s short trip to take on Sky produced a real goal treat Six in total Cockney Rebel claimed the opening goal Sky catching Black’s defence too exposed 1-0 McSpeed exploited the frailty to double the advantage before repeating the same move to make it 3-0 Mika completed the Sky scoring with the 4th Black shell-shocked in desperate need of a rethink especially in the back line The comeback started when Phil the Power poked home a rebound His first effort had hit both posts before he hit finally the net Glen found space to double the Black goal tally 4-2 Sky shut up shop and killed off the contest with some clever game management, Master of Defensive Dark Arts Mr Rebel calmly seeing out the time to deny Black any further chances 4-2 the winning margin
Unfortunately the news embargo placed on Black v Pink meant a delay before the report could be filed with Reuters The blackout had nothing to do with an unverified report of a missed Meldrew penalty (well saved by the Cat apparently) Pink did go on to win by 2 goals to nil though the Pink scorers were not divulged due to on-going image rights issues Pink were pegged back in their final game with Purple Kirsty (with a fresh leg for this important second match) plundered a brace for Pink but goals by Gonzalo (when not ‘running’ foul of stand-in Ref Rainford (Lord) did register a goal, Tom Derby and Barry Wizz were also on target for Purple The game ended in an honourable draw 3-3 though some questions in the House are expected Reports of a good morning for Yellow’s PaulF included a description of a fine goal, however as Yellow failed to find the target in both games, some doubt on the veracity of the report must be expressed Good intentions just don’t count
The session ended with handshakes all round followed by lashings of delicious cake in the serene , sumptuous surroundings of the Slipper Salon at our “reserved table” for twenty plus The celebration marking Les Meldrew’s latest birthday at the end of last week. Let’s do it all over again on Wednesday evening at Sutton Leisure Centre No Milan Derby this week either
Bright sunshine greeted the players who formed into four teams on the Sutton SoccerDome AstroTurf for Wednesday’s midweek session But the warm sunlight soon made way for growing shadows as the temperature dramatically dipped
The team were;
Red - Phil the Power, Helen, Dav, Benny, Simon, Deggs and Joe the Ghost
Blue - Les Meldrew, Tom Derby, Jason, Les H, Haggis, Peter T and Chris 10P (1st outing of the year after injury)
Orange - Tom Stretch, Neil Stretch, Deano, Steve C, Little John, Midweek Michelle and Martin Mc
Yellow - Andy Man, Eileen, Subbuteo Dave, Cockney Rebel, Chris 4G, Steve S and Grav
The first game featured Red and Yellow with the Red team fielding the dynamic duo of Deggs and Joe the Ghost upfront Football is littered with playing duos who never got on despite their relative success Keegan and Toshack, Greaves and Gilzean, Starsky and Hutch, Cole and Sheringham and not forgetting Little and Large (as hard as you might try) Well Derek and Joe are the SHWFC version, largely because they can’t understand when they talk to each other Deggs did hit the net for Red but Cockney Rebel hit back and the game fizzled out in a 1-1 draw
In Jeff Betty’s second game Red were pipped at the post by Blue in a nine goal thriller
Peter T, Jason and Meldrew sealed the deal despite goals by Dav 2, Simon and Helen Blue held out in a pulsating game that everyone seemed to enjoy
On the adjacent Blue met Orange in a classic match decorated with great goals and teamwork throughout Chris 10P found the net early for Blue with a bit of trickery to wrong foot Tom Stretch in the build up (no mean feat) Blue powering into a lead Orange trapped in their defensive area struggling to clear to set up Deano or Steve Carine
Next Jason picked off a poor clearance to steer Blue two up and well on top before Steve Carine spun and diverted a cross with a single touch 2-1 Carine and Deano then linked up to bring the game level Chris 4G appeared to have found the decisive goal 3-2 Blue’s lead restored Les Hewitt preserved the advantage with a great save from Little John Steve Carine completed his hat trick with a stunning shot from an impossible angle 3-3, still 5 minutes to play
Both teams pressed for a winner but there was a defensive response with Neil Stretch, Martin Mc, Peter Teeling and Les Hewitt all outstanding for their respective teams
In the end time elapsed with a last minute Chris 10P effort curling beyond the far post as close as we got to a winner 3-3 Another excellent performance by both sides
The final game featured Orange and Yellow and followed the pattern Cockney Rebel found Grav with a divine through ball that was dispatched in good style Yellow 1-0 ahead Andy Man produced possibly his worse shot in his illustrious career, clearing the bar by some distance Those around were astonished but our Man shrugged it off, though clearly he was mildly outraged by the miskick Yellow were something of a surprise package
Orange in their first game showed lethal finishing at times but Steve Smith got on the end of some impressive teamwork to double the Yellow lead 2-0 Eileen produced a decent save to keep Yellow’s lead intact as Orange finally taking a grip on possession Steve Carine finally hit back after finding some space 2-1 Yellow ahead Deano struck a leveller for Orange with 7 minutes left
With time ebbing away both sides Steve Carine hit an absolute screamer Orange to put his side in front for the first time Heart breaking for Yellow who couldn’t have done more to compete
Physical pain is one thing but to compete and lead throughout until almost the end is quite another thing Handshakes all round Some great games close scores and loads of fun and friendly competition
Pain In My Heart* - Otis Redding ( no other words required)
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