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Something’s Gotta Give*

It’s been a good week for Les ‘Victor Meldrew’ Brack, our Treasurer and occasional goal grabber Record numbers turned out to play for both this week’s sessions Cue hands rubbing vigorously together and outline of a smile (or was it wind?) on his face

The Sutton indoor/outdoor feast that signals midweek lived up to its reputation for jolly good fun with occasional flashes of excellent football thrown in

The indoor SoccerDome produced its usual glut of goals, though we are assured that the first 40 minutes of play was very even

The teams were;

Yellow - Andy Man, Disco Deggs, Laura, Joe the Boxer, Andy Powell and Ray Carroll

Red - Tom Stretch Parr, Dave Gray, Les Meldrew, Chris 4G and Kirsty

Until the 41st minute the score was locked at 2-2 but then Yellow conceded 3 goals in just 2 minutes There was another Yellow score but it was their last of the evening Red hit 5 goals without reply to stroll to a one-sided 10-3 victory

Meldrew was unapologetic at the conclusion of the game His selection prowess of ensuring he was once more a winner was pure coincidence he explained - Michaylo Rule?

Yellow goal scorers were Andy Man, Joe the Ghost and Laura (3 in 3 games now) Reds scorers Phil the Power with 5, Kirsty 2, Tom Stretch, Meldrew V, and Chris 4G Full marks were heaped upon Referee Mr Chopper who in truth was well on top of the action

The AstroTurf warriors warmed up to the prospect of a 8 v 9 match up But their photo opportunities were interrupted by the late arrival of 2 embarrassed miscreants One was so late that he earned the wrath of El Pres’ in a verbal lashing that was reminiscent of the infamous hair dryer of yesteryear

The eventual teams were;

Orange - Little John, Daz Sammo, Martin Mc, Jeff Betty, Mike Ox, Haggis, Tom Derby, Dave Bates and Deano

White - Eamon, Cockney Rebel, Clarkie, Gonzalo, Michelle, Norman, Jill, Dave Markland, Chris Willo and Neil

So 10 White v 9 Orange for the first segment As is the custom now there was a period of sizing up with both teams trying to impose themselves on their opponents Deano fired a corner across the box but no one had read the chance to take advantage Mike Ox was close but no cigar as they say

Referee reminders of the difference between illegal running and legitimate walking set the tone Both sides, aware that they were under scrutiny, settled into sweeping passes and more measured play and it was a joy to watch

White seized the initiative with a good goal claimed by Norman following good work by Gaz, Jill and Gonzalo

Keeper Eamon left his task between the sticks revealing a dark shirt that just confused everyone He was forced to wear an available White Everton shirt against his better judgement and then endured an uncomfortable spell adapting to his new attire

At this point and as if in divine judgement a hard rain drenched everyone A 10 minute deluge to test the mettle of all Daz fell foul of his now usual fourth touch, and declared loudly ‘the guy hates me’ El Presidente doubled over with cracked ribs from the laughter waved play on after the inevitable free kick to witness Dave Markland fire wide with the goal at his mercy At the other end Martin Mc went close, Gonzalo hit the post but made no mistake with his next effort White 2-nil ahead Orange showing some sharp inter passing highlights but no end product

At the break Dave Markland switched to Orange to hand them the numerical advantage for the remainder of the game In benign weather

White extended their lead with Gonzalo tucking away from close in The combination of Gaz, Chris Willo and Cockney Rebel were dealing well with the Orange threat of Daz, Ox and Deano

3-nil and well in charge White produced some great interplay with Norman, Neil and Jill playing their part too Out of the blue, Dave Bates deflected a free kick from Daz (fully 30 yards from goal) using his chest to take the ball into the corner of the White goal Haggis had a couple of chances but lacked the composure under pressure then suddenly was ice cool to side-foot a great effort into the White net 3-2 with 14 minutes left

Were White able to close out the game? Could Orange pip their rivals?

The answer just moments later was provided when Cockney Rebel slotted home following another excellent interplay involving most of his team mates 4-2 to White

The margin might have been wider; Michelle hurried a decent chance rather than taking an second touch to steady, Gonzalo claimed 2 but was narrowly wide twice and hit a post, Jill was thwarted when looking sure to score Orange had several reasonable chances but lacked real penetration against the White defence

The session ended with handshakes all round and tales of what might have been ‘if only’!

The Boot Room, bereft of Lord Rainford nursing a heavy cold and lighter hot toddy (courtesy of his Butler), regaled with news of both sessions Tributes were paid to Ian Hopkins aka The Vicar of Dibley who has moved to a new Parish as a Missionary to Maghull (true) All agreed he will be sorely missed although probably not by keepers who got their hands to one of his shots!

As you are all aware we have joined forces with Pilkington FC and Ruskin Drive (though we retain our Independence as a Club) El Presidente has attended 2 of their Committee Meetings subsequently

As a result of this new partnership we’ve obtained sponsorship from Steve Caunce Limited (long term supporter of Pilkingtons) for a kit for our Ladies The new Kappa kit will carry our Club badge plus the sponsor’s logo and replicate the Pilkingtons all green colours to reinforce the spirit of partnership we now enjoy

Our thanks to Steve Caunce and Mark Hayes GM of Ruskin & Chairman of Pilkingtons Photos to follow when possible

Speaking of photos - tenuous link number two

Eamon O’Donnell is pictured below in his skin tight Everton change kit

His claim that it was ‘burning my skin’ was dismissed Eamon supports another mid-table Club

It was in fact St Helens Acid Rain so no problem then

Player of the Day as chosen by Andy Man Houghton was Kirsty Stockton who had an excellent game Commiserations to Phil the Power who’s 5 goal haul might have won the accolade on another night His claim was probably undermined by Meldrew claiming one back-heeled effort was like Dalglish (immediate derisive remarks) Hard luck Phil your time will surely come Well done Kirsty (Harry’s shaving products miss out again)

Something’s Gotta Give* - Camila Cabello

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