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Deggsy's Midnight Running and Biblical rumblings

Wednesday night's Sutton session welcomed 21 players to enjoy their evening's work out As usual the assembly split in two groups for indoors and outdoors play On a surprisingly mild night the AstroTurf group warmed up briefly under the watchful gaze of Referee Jeff Betty with El Presidente enthusing the troops to prepare for their session

Meanwhile in the SoccerDome, Coach Davies amended his usual pre -match warm up to introduce some passing 1-2 drills, a simple tester that some players found more of a challenge than others. Coach then produced 2 sides having contemplated his selections with great study

Yellows - Joe the Ghost, Grav, Lefty, Lord Rainford & the late Colin Williams

Not Yellows: Speedo Mick, Les Meldrew, Coach Davies, The Vicar of Dibley & Citeh Geoff.

The Yellows were quickly 2-0 down as Les and then the Vicar took advantage of what a Spin Doctor might have called 'playing a high line'; but which the rest of us would rightly have called 'utter shite defending'. Regular Blog devotees might have observed that Yellows were light on the defensive side, and so it proved with often only M'Lord in one half of the pitch and even then only when in goal

Lord Rainford reduced the deficit to 2-1 just prior to the first break by conning Coach into thinking that he would, as usual, blaze his shot over the bar. Instead he rolled his effort along the ground into the corner of the net.

In the second stanza Dibley, Speedo and Les ripped the defenseless Yellows apart with 4 unanswered goals. Les in particular was the embodiment of 1 Samuel 16:17 as was Dibley despite on several occasions taking his line from Verse 2 of Psalm 11 (Biblical references as our Reporter gets religion)

In the final period two early goals from Ian Lefty Bridge for the Yellows led to optimistic chants of 'we're going to win 7-6'. But it wasn't to be as their defensive wantonness was once more to the fore Speedo twice felt the attentions of his Lordship who might have been sin-binned had Jeff Betty not preferred to officiate outside.

The final score was 9-4 with two hat trick heroes in Speedo and MOTM Les. The final goal was possibly the best of the night as M'Lord (modestly?) got his second of the night with an unstoppable volley with the outside of his right foot in off the post. A shout of 'have it' rent the air and 'have it' we all did - an enjoyable hours walking football and a good laugh and a craic

The AstroTurf game was split into two periods with Mark Davies (no relation) switching sides at the break to balance the sides in a very practical manner The teams were;

Orange - El Presidente, Phil, Cockney Rebel, Thatto Dave, Goldie and Mark

Blue - Tom Stretch, Disco Deggs, Chopper, Nigel and Lee

The opening half was a cautious affair with play stretching from side to side as Orange used their numerical advantage to drag Blues around the pitch Its a tough ask for any team to chase a game against opponents with an extra man but Orange gradually increased their pressure on Blues goal before Thatto Dave opened the scoring with smart finish after a fine passage of play Phil, Goldie and Cockney Rebel were ever-willing workers with Thatto Dave and El Presidente solid at the back Mark delayed in possession at times when an early pass might have yielded more, but he was always an outlet, something that would prove fruitful later Blues restricted their rivals to a 1-0 first half lead Would the advantage of the extra man in the second half tilt the balance in Blues favour?

The final half was interrupted with the early arrival of St Trinian's Male Six Formers, who thrashed a hockey ball around behind one goal with some abandon El Presidente invited them to play in a safer area and harmony was restored with just the briefest exchange of irreligious words

Blues and now Mark, poured into Orange's half with great pressure but were unable to break through Orange were well-organised and happy to absorb Blue threats and hit their opponents on the break As play continued it was Orange that found the goals to settle the game Goldie hit a first goal across the keeper for his first Soon after he repeated the effort, this time the recipient of an outrageous piece of luck when his volley screwed off his foot to loop away from Tom Stretch's outstretched grasp. A huge chunk of good fortune enough to decide the match at last Disco Deggs had been relatively quiet ( be serious - Editor) but was alert to fire a goal and reignite Blues chances He had another effort that he managed to hit wider than the corner flag at one point but he is always keen to get a shot off 'Who dares wins Derek' said no one!

A word of praise for Referee Jeff Betty too He was on top of everything from the first whistle Running was kept strictly under his control, questionable tackling was reduced (side tackles especially) But he did offer a glimpse of fallibility with the last kick of the game His electronic timer clearly sounding to indicate full time just before Mark crashed a good finish beyond the Orange keeper

In a controversial end to proceedings Jeff Betty had his Pitt moment by awarding the goal and having a laugh at the protests that followed

Referees can't live with them, can't live without them!

VAR would have shared his fun

Handshakes all round and lots of humour and craic to share around

Its a grand game as the expression goes!

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