Back In The Saddle*

For a Club that doesn’t do normal, Monday morning’s Ruskin Sports Village session came around with indecent haste With some of our members no longer camera shy or still dreaming of their role in the upcoming cinematic release, there was a distinct lack of numbers The weather was clearly a factor Storm Floris was scheduled to hit Scotland at the same time as our normal kick off Phil the Cat Mullarkey reported live from Glasgow that it was ‘jolly blowy’ Ashy warned all to wrap up But in truth except for a sprinkling of drizzle the conditions were nothing more than a distraction

Two games were quickly assembled by Football Supremo Andy Man Selections announced, shirts distributed and limbs gently stretched and teased into shape for the morning’s efforts

The teams were;

Green - Ashy, Enoch, Lefty Bridge, Citeh Geoff, Little John and Mika

Red - Barry Wizz, Wickie, Lord Rainford, Haggis, Aldo and Phil the Power

Black - Eileen, McSpeed, Roger, Andy Man, Eamon and Mike Thomo

Purple - Tom Stretch, Triallist, Steve Jones, Kirsty, Cockney Rebel and Snakehips

We were blessed with an adequate sufficiency of Referees Ref Jeff Betty and El Presidente with the whistles and the mighty power to make or break budding superstars The Club’s latest addition El Presidente’s Granddaughter, 8 years old Betsy, paying special attention to the misdemeanours of extra touches and not walking

The opening game between Red and Green turned out to be a very good close contest Some players insisted on trying to referee the game (where are they when we need them?) Others were determined to make their physical presence felt at critical times Neither side truly deserved to win but again neither deserved to lose Chances were few and far between with play mostly confined to the midfield margins At the end both teams could claim a share of the spoils a very engaging but ultimately frustrating nil - nil result

The second game started with the drizzle growing in intensity, a thorough soaking by the end The spirits were by no means dampened however as Red accounted for Purple in a close game decided by distribution errors and superior Red composure in front of goal

Baz resisted his instincts to slot home the opening goal Red just about shading the possession Purple roared back with some great approach work but off target shooting Aldo doubled the Red advantage with a calm finish 2-0 Purple hard done to but lacking the clinical edge to punish their opponents Steve Jones did find the target after some close shaves for 2-1 The game was now very evenly balanced with Red in real danger of conceding a ‘team not walking’ penalty But calm was restored and Aldo sealed the game with his side’s third and decisive goal 3-1 the final outcome A good contest and closer than 3-1 might suggest

Ref Jeff’s first match featured Black in a shoot out with Purple the bruise derby of old It was Black that prevailed with Eamon, Andy Man and Mike Thomo on the mark Steve Jones did claim the Purple consolation Purple lacking the cutting edge where it mattered most perhaps? Black ended their morning with a fine victory in a close contest with Green

Black had earlier raced into a 3-0 lead thanks to goals by Eamon with a brace and Mike Thomo At half time 3-1 ahead Black seemed safe but Andy Enoch Powell grabbed his first, before Mike Thomo scored his second with a fine individual goal for 4-2 Enoch claimed his second with Lefty grabbing Green’s third to narrow the margin and put real pressure on Black 4-3 but with little time left

The final result was a narrow victory for Black 4-3 the game ending on a soggy note

As players gathered to hand in shirts and change their footwear the promised deluge hit Ruskin The trip back to the dressing rooms by now a very sodden rush as the wind stiffened and the storm began in earnest

A good morning; some good football, some fine passing, some desperate passing too All in all it was good to return to normality, even the weather followed our usual pattern, threatening but ultimately not too bad

The tale of midweek was a very impressive assembly of players, shoe-horned into four very effective team units by our Football Manager A word of praise for Andy Man(anger) Houghton, who has a rare talent for quickly assessing his resources and making team line-up decisions in the most trying of circumstances That so many games are close is a tribute to his vision

We were blessed with the introduction of yet another new lady member, Dawn Lewis, a former Everton player who had endured knee surgery She is now seeking a prolonged playing career with the good folk of SHWFC Dawn’s appearance meant that 16 ladies had now joined the burgeoning ranks of our membership in the last couple of years We can only applaud that and echo our ongoing commitment to inclusivity

The teams selections were;

Yellow - Chris 4G, Haggis, Benno, PJ, Enoch, Les H and Simon

Pink - Joe the Ghost, Jason, Neil Stretch, Helen, Steve Carine, Steve Smith and Lord Rainford

Blue - Grav, Citeh Geoff, Dawn, Cockney Rebel, Tom Stretch, Colin the Late and Andy Man

Black - Smoke Bomba #1, Phil the Power, Mike Thomo, Midweek Michelle, Little John, Deggs and Ian H

Our Referees for the jaunt were Head Judge Jeff Betty and El Presidente with ball retrieval and ‘advice’ by Geoff Prout, with Phil the Cat in support role Interestingly there was a number of people watching the action from the wire News of our fame and interest in the games has surely spread in the locale

The first round of games set the tone for the session Jeff oversaw the intriguingly close encounter that left Pink and Blue all square after some entertaining end to end play Goals by Joe for Pink and Colin for Blue meant the game finished as it started 1-1 no winners (except Walking Football) and no losers either “A very enjoyable match”, understated our Head Ref

Black and Yellow served up a similarly impressive performance which ebbed from end to end Both sides produced moments of outstanding creativity but both lacked the composure or clinical quality to find a goal It had started rather differently with Yellow on top and then ahead thanks to a cool finish applied by Haggis That first minute strike was the only score Yellow did hit the post later, Black had bags of chances but no reward 1-0 the final score Yellow good value for the victory

In the second round Blue found the net with a greater regularity to eclipse Black by three goals to one Goals by Andy Man, Cockney Rebel and Grav propelled Blue to a hard earned win Smoke Bomba #1 did claim Black’s consolation but the final verdict was a 3-1 win for the Blue A winless night for Black despite plenty of half chances

The final match featured a classic match with Yellow taking an early lead through Andy Enoch Powell Pink were caught defensively missing as Enoch picked his spot to fire home Yellow rode their luck, leaving their rear guard hopelessly exposed Yellow failed to take full advantage and Steve Smith was on hand to find the leveller 1-1 Pressure on the Yellow goal allowed Joe the Ghost time and space to score Pink’s second goal 2-1 the game turned on its head in a very short time Les Hewitt produced a decent save to keep Yellow in the contest Steve Carine intercepted a weak clearance to potentially seal the win Pink now 3-1 ahead With a measure of desperation typifying Yellow’s attempts to get back into the contest Simon found a little space to lash home from fully 25 yards out 3–2 Yellow given a lifeline perhaps? There was a moment of comedy gold when Joe wrong-footed himself to concede a foul for just 13 touches, like a Pantomime Horse offered one wag Easiest decision of the night said another One minute from time Jason was the calmest player on the park as he stroked the ball into the corner for 4-2 Pink too composed and calm when required Yellow a little too dependent on the momentum of being fired up Great game though and a fitting end to the entertainment News of a very encouraging debut for Dawn filtered back to the hierarchy as focus shifted to the Boot Room and the media duties

The weekly Boot Room visit (the Turks Head in Cooper Sreet) is of course part of the unofficial warm down activities A hardy band of individuals sit around drink beer and dissect the night’s action The Boot Room banter is compulsory and expected from all who attend It must be stressed that it is an entirely discretionary activity and we acknowledge that other pubs exist (really?) and serve libations to order But there’s something quite magical about the Boot Room and long may that tradition continue

Back In The Saddle* - a new tune by Luke Combs ( it’s been a while since good ole boys featured in our Blog titles)