Just a distraction*

As so often in recent times the number of members who suddenly discovered; a library book to return, a lawn that really did need a trim or a hairdressers appointment that they just had to keep and on and on The hardy bunch of folks that did turn up to play were rewarded with champagne football and no dodgy diving or disputed 'goals' It seems that not all share that view however and whilst we applaud everyone's right to choose we can only say 'you missed a great game!'

Those assembled were quickly put through their stretching and lunging warm up exercises by El Presidente who with the assistance of the happily returning Ref Jeff Betty (shoulder injury shrugged off) then selected 2 formidable teams to do battle

The teams were;

Pink - Chopper, El Presidente, Grav, Harrison, Steve Honeyman, Cockney Rebel and Goldie

White - Chris G, Joe the Ghost, Steve Ford, Citeh Geoff, Sharon, Tony Snakehips and Gonzalo (cameo role as emergency keeper)

The game started brightly, especially for those playing into the blinding sunlight eminating from behind the Far End Pink struggled to establish a foothold as White pressed to add to the Pink defenders discomfort in trying to clear their lines But eventually Pink did settle and start to spray the ball about to stretch their opponents There was some excellent passing moves from Sharon, Steve Ford and Citeh Geoff. But Pink's defensive cohesion held firm Play ended with scores level at the break

The second half was decisive with tactical switches enabling Pink more freedom to press for goals Steve Honeyman swept a fine effort into the corner beyond Gonzalo to open the scoring At the other end Chris G and the Ghost wasted chances with timely blocks by Chopper and El Presidente protecting and preserving their narrow lead Our leader enjoyed (a dubious description how can anyone claim that they enjoy playing in goal?) another fine night with a series of saves to deny the opposition, after his work the previous week is a change of position on the cards? NO it definitely isn’t

Pink doubled their lead with some smart counter atacking setting up Grav with a chance that he didn't waste 2-0 to Pink with plenty of time for any comeback But it was the predatory Honeyman who sealed the victory with a chance that he tucked away with a slight ricochet from Gonzalo The final minutes passed with Whites seeking a consolation. Gonzalo (just 10 weeks after his latest knee surgery) moved up top to try his luck, Joe, Tony, Chris G and Steve Ford all were thwarted by the Pink rearguard Ref Betty showed he'd lost none of his wicked sense of humour when he awarded a free kick to White after El Presidente prevented a goal bound effort reaching its target with intervention of his sizeable head It seemed harsh the ball was driven with some force from less than a yard away from our hero defender The fact that he had no idea who had shot and has a sizeable lump under the eye today is irrelevant too The free kick was wasted and Pink scrambled the ball away to secure a fine 3-0 win For large periods of the game they were on the back foot having to defend their net from wave after wave of White attacks

'Pink's clinical finishing was the real difference' explained Ref Jeff as he summarised for the TV cameras at the Boot Room post game

There's no session on Monday next 2nd May with Ruskin ironing out the playing surface after Cockney Rebel's complaints Wednesday night we will doubtless be inundated with returning members fresh from library, hairdressers and great outdoors

Just a distraction* - Lilytoon

Next week will see the introduction of Fixed Penalty Notices for non bib washing members This follows the investigation undertaken by the Met Police serious bib squad

Short sharp Justice will be administered by Lord Rainford and Les Meldrew to the offenders Happily Hanging Judge Meldrew cannot be prosecutor and judge too

We play National Cup Over 60s match v Brunswick Old Boys at Ruskin 11am on Monday 9th May with our Over 65s hosting visitors Neston Nomads a week later at the same time and venue All members are urged to come along and support the Club

Over 65s Squad is

Les Brack, Colin Williams, Mick Makin, Mike Andrews, Dave Barrow, Allan Maldon, Tom Parr, Steve Forshaw, Tony Byrne, Geoff Painter and Peter Fitzpatrick